Monday, February 22, 2010

Not nearly as sophisticated as I pretend to be.

After a long week full of moderate disappointment, courtesy BioShock 2 and Dante'e Inferno (reviews pending for both) I was actually ready to spend an evening away from my television and in front of someone else's. Instead of hunkering down with my arcade stick and practicing my link combos like I really need to do I ran off to a friends house for a few beers some co-op something or other. I dragged my PS3 controller along, expecting to work on Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 or Marvel vs Capcom 2, but we never got that far. After sampling the God of War III demo (attention Visceral games, this is how gore is done) I asked him was Critter Crunch was.

'Just a little puzzle game,' he sneered, 'nothing you would be interested in.' This is the person I dragged into Super Puzzle Fighter just so I could beat him at it. He knew what he was doing.

I will not bore you with all the mechanics, suffice to say it is about feeding small critters to larger critters, thereby causing them to explode and drop gems. There is also an odd 'vomiting rainbows into your offspring's mouth' bonus from very large chains. The game was bizarre, the challenge mode devious, and it was all completely addictive. I think that Critter Crunch has a co-op mode, but we never got there, just passing the controller back and forth as was done back in the days of turbo buttons and cartridge based consoles. It took up an entire evening; had working not been required this morning we would have gone on, adding more beer to the game could have only had excellent results.

It was nice to play something simple again. No religious controversy, no plots based on Ayn Rand novels, no blood, no gore, no over sized demon wangs, no creepy little girls with a thing for corpses. Just a puzzle game, two dudes, and some beers.

This is what happens when you drink too much Delerium Nocturnum

All that being said, Mass Effect II should arrive today or tomorrow. So stoked.

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