Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Yes, Mr. Burns works there

Somewhere deep in the halls of Activision head quarters...

Bungie: Boy, it sure is nice to be out on my own. Now I can put out my games on all platforms and finally open my cash haberdashery. And who better to help with that than my rich uncle Activision!

Rich Uncle Activision: I am all about the bottom line, my boy. Come into my office and we will discuss what game you are going to make.

Bungie: Excellent! I have a few ideas I would like to show you.

Activision: When I said discuss I meant tell. Make Halo.

Bungie: What?

Activision: Did I stutter? Make Halo.

Bungie: Evil uncle Microsoft still owns Halo. I am not allowed to play with that any more.

Activision: So call it something else, I don't care, that is what you are making. But it needs to keep people coming back with inconsistent loot drops and sections that are impossible to do alone and this needs to create a platform ripe for future micro transaction exploitation. Oh, and console MMOs are going to be a thing, so do that, too.

Bungie: But you already have WoW.

Activision: Damn straight, and I don't want to pay for the infrastructure required to do that again. MMO but not quite so big. And no humor! There is no place for humor in a game targeted at the 18 to 24 year old bro-gamers.

Bungie: Games like that already exist. Good games. Watermark games like Phantasy Star Online and Borderlands and Guild Wars.

Activision: I don't own those. Do I own those? Doesn't matter. Your name will sell it. From the creators of Halo comes not-Halo, the FPS MMO!

Bungie: Does it need to be any good?

Activision: No. but there has to be a new one every year.

1 comment:

  1. I almost want to get on Google Plus so I can recommend this on Google Plus.