Friday, July 10, 2015

What not to wear

Nothing much happened last night in Arkham Knight. I did the super hero equivalent of all the chores that had been stacking up while I was doing something more interesting. I collected Riddler question marks, disarmed bombs, destroyed checkpoints, you know, the usual stuff. When I did get back to the main story I had to deal with another terrible costume for Harley and a Robin outfit that I am forced to admit isn't stupid. That may be the first nice thing I have ever said about Robin.

That's a dead horse he's beating. Yeah.

Going back to Harley, what is wrong with her classic look from the animated series?

Suggestive? Slightly. But at least it doesn't look like she is jumping around in her underwear as it does in Gods and Monsters:

That's terrible. Really, really, terrible. Harley has fallen victim, as have all the villains to different degrees, to the need to make Batman even darker and grittier than he already was. It is as if the characters are still doing penance for Batman and Robin and the infamous bat nipples. Collectively I say: get over it.

Batman is dark enough. His enemies should provide the color to his stark black and grey attire. And they should be, you know, clothed. Poison Ivy is another example of a character that has almost ruined by multiple passes through the grim-dark filter. The classic:

Simple. Sexy. Wearing pants.

For starters, no god damn pants. But I do like her angry, powerful face. Still, not as good as the old version.

This has turned into a 'get off my lawn' post. And that's okay. Why do all the characters look like they belong on Hot Topic t-shirts now? The only one who is safe is Mr J himself. It is almost impossible to screw up Joker. Almost.

What the fuck was that all about.