Friday, July 22, 2016

Missing the point

While I do stand by my statement that Mighty No 9 is not a terrible game, merely a plain, rather bare bones version of what was originally teased and promised, it is missing something that it synonymous with Mega Man games: having to fight all eight robots again in the final area. This was true for all of the Mega Man games that I remember playing. In the run up to fighting Dr. Wily (again) you face all of the previous bosses, only this time armed to the teeth with their stolen weapons, making it much easier that the first encounters.

Mighty No 9 does not do that and it does it for *gasp* story reasons. Beck is not destroying the other mighty numbers (terrible name), he is rescuing them, breaking free from the grasp of whatever or whoever has driven them mad. It is just a side bonus that in doing so he steals some of their power.

And to that I say, 'Lame. Laaaaaaaame.'

That is a staple of Mega Man games. To relegate it to an optional boss rush mode is just silly. Almost as silly as the shoehorned bits of drama, like finding out that the bad guy is not the bad guy, or he is a bad guy but he is not the bad guy this time, and that the good guy is actually the bad guy's son, and so on. Mega Man 2 was and is the best Mega Man game and it barely had text, much less poorly voice acted melodrama.

Mighty No 9 got caught up it what it thought people wanted, a modern Mega Man, when what it should been is the classic Mega Man, just in HD. Take a look at Bloodstained, it gets it. For now.


I opened up my new Game Informer, a magazine that Gamestop gives me for free that gets thumbed through once and then recycled, and found they had graced Mirror's Edge Catalyst with the dreaded 6 out of 10 review. Not good, not terrible, just forgettable. This can't be, I thought, and I read the review.

Then I played the game. shit.

Catalyst is the Mirror's Edge 'ubigame' made by people who do not understand how the 'ubigame' works. Yes, there is quite a bit of side content, but because this is Mirror's Edge, a game whose entire point it avoiding combat and parkouring your way across rooftops as quickly as possible, every single side mission is exactly the same. Minus the story trappings (and interesting level design) of the main missions they are crushingly boring, yet still almost required, wastes of time.

And did I mention that they are far more difficult than they need to be? Most games that require you to do something in a specific amount of time give the player a margin of error. Not Catalyst - if you are given 44 seconds to deliver something to a dead drop that is exactly long it will take. I have yet to finish one with more than 1 second left on the clock and got stuck on another for over half hour last night (because I am a stubborn ass) in which I was steps away from the goal every single fucking time.

I would skip them entirely but I need the experience points to unlock abilities. 6 out of 10? I really hate admitting that a magazine was right.

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