Friday, May 18, 2018

Not worth thinking about

Black Mirror was so bad that I cannot muster up the energy required to make fun of it. I just deleted about three paragraph's worth of complaining about its sound design, as if that was its greatest offense. I did just find out that it feels like an ancient point and click adventure because it is a remake/prequel of an ancient point and click adventure game.

Well, 2003 ancient, but that's still pretty old.

That is no excuse for rotten character models, terrible voice acting, incredible load times and a plot that thinks for a second about going somewhere dark and stygian before opting for boring and forgettable and somehow to complicated and poorly explained to easily summarize. There is an ancient druidic curse, patricide and kissing cousins. Everyone save for David and his fathers therapist who shows up unannounced in the third chapter dies and yet there is no resolution.

Maybe it was good in 2003. It should have stayed there.

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